No, no need to go to those lengths. Re-writing the whole thing isn’t necessary. It’s just that you refer to “Mind” as the be all and end all.
This isn’t the case. Our mind is a tool of the Real Us We are the Observer, the Witness, the Higher Self, call it what you may. This Observer is the part of us that never changes. Our body, our emotions, our mind (contents, beliefs, etc) are of us but not us.
When you look out through non-judgemental, non-labelling, non-discrimminating eyes, whether you’re two years old or one-hundred and two, You see the world. You see it without interpretation. Mind does the interpretation.
A major part of You (the Real or Higher Self) is also the decision-maker, the Will of the Higher Self, as distinct from the will of the little self or ego or conditioned self.
I think you need to include a glossary of terms. And when you compile it, be very careful how you interpret the word “Mind” for your readers. The will of the ‘conditioned mind’ is the will of the ego. The Will of the Higher Self (Nature, Life, God – once again call it what you want) is the Will of the Real Self. The Will of our Higher Self is in alignment -because it is part of, or so I believe- Universal Will. Our Higher Will and our Higher Self are part of God.
This Higher Part of us can be likened to one infinitely small spark of The All. It could be likened to one water molecule in an infinite ocean. But it is the same as the rest of that ocean. And this ocean is all that is: an Infinite Creator and Witness to Its own creations. The creations are illusory as far as this part of us is concerned: they arise, stay for a while, and pass away.
Anyway, I hope this is of some help.
If you’d like to read more of Tom’s stuff, go to http://hubpages.com/profile/tusitala+tom